Limiting beliefs and how to get rid of them
Does the way I think affect what my beliefs are? Definitely. We can think about life events either in the context of "moving FORWARD" or in the context of "moving AWAY". What do you think, what is your way of thinking? To understand more about what characterizes each of these mindsets, let's look at the example of moving. Imagine that you have planned such a life event as moving to another city. The "Moving FORWARD" way of thinking allows you to look and focus on the opportunities that this life event will bring: "I can't wait to move, get to know a new environment, new people, new places and things that will expand my vision." "Moving AWAY" focuses thoughts and views on the burdens associated with this event: "moving again, it's so complicated, it will take so much time and energy, moving all the things, I feel tired of it already". This is a great example of how our way of thinking and perspective on events affects how we feel. I look at the event positively = I feel excited, inspired. I look at the event as a complication = I feel tired, my overall energy level drops. This does not mean that focusing on the opportunities and good aspects of the event makes the complications disappear. Moving is usually a time-consuming and laborious process, but with a positive attitude, we have much more energy and even the difficult process becomes more enjoyable. And isn't life all about the process? Make it full of joy and light, even if it's complicated?
My way of thinking has a profound effect on what beliefs I form about life and myself, what beliefs I allow myself to adopt and embody in my everyday life as my guides. So, first of all, if we want to change our beliefs, we must also change our way of thinking. The way I look at life in general. What is my view.
My beliefs can move me forward, inspire, build and develop, be like a powerful internal engine that makes me work. These are evolving beliefs. This time I'm drawing attention to limiting beliefs that slow us down, make us not believe in our own abilities, prevent us from acting, make us stay where we actually don't feel good. Some examples:
I will have "heavy wings" all my life
this life has failed
I don't like/I'm not good at sports
in our family, all the women are in unhappy relationships
earning a lot and doing what you like is impossible
everything comes hard in life
work is not a garden of roses and fun
it's not worth trying, I won't succeed anyway
everyone in our family is a failure
not everyone can be rich and beautiful
I'm not good enough to do that
it can't be that everything in life goes as planned
I am not capable and brave enough to do it
Limiting beliefs are usually generalized and absurd. If we look deeper and start asking clarifying questions like "who said that? do you have examples of it? have you seen/experienced it yourself? do you have evidence?", we remain without answers.
Our beliefs are formed already in childhood - from family, neighbors, teachers, care persons. I must immediately get rid of the desire to blame someone for the fact that I have developed limiting beliefs. Our parents also had parents who may not have done everything right. Let's forgive our own if something has happened to us too, and let's focus on the future and opportunities to change, so that tomorrow will be more fulfilling.Even in adulthood, we adopt limiting beliefs, such as being in a toxic relationship with a manipulative partner. The less confident I am in myself and my abilities, the easier it is for others to manipulate me and make me believe limiting beliefs.
It turns out that if I get rid of limiting beliefs, I solve most of my problems. The question certainly arises - if it is so simple, why is everyone in this world not successful and happy? Because we all know very well WHAT needs to be done, but most of the time we are too lazy to actually do it and get out of our comfort zone. I'm comfortable where I am, even if things aren't exactly as they appear in my dreams. However, I know everything here very well and can feel like a "fish in water". That's why it's vital to work on your beliefs, because developing beliefs is like an inner spark that prevents you from sitting on the couch for too long and doing nothing.It should also be understood that any aspect of work with oneself, changing one's way of thinking, changing one's views, will not be quick. We always want quick and immediate results and are ready to give up when after two 10-minute meditations, life has not changed.
Armed with patience and a genuine desire to change, we can shed limiting beliefs and instead develop forward-moving beliefs. How to achieve this? First of all, you must check your beliefs and recognize which of them are limiting and inhibiting my development. Once we have recognized them, we can start working with them:
change your way of thinking, look at the world as a place rich in resources and opportunities, and developing beliefs will form by themselves,
use meditation - guided meditation that includes developing and positive beliefs will allow these beliefs to take root in your subconscious,
seek help - a coach, psychologist, art therapist, or maybe even a friend with whom you can make a weekly discussion club.
It doesn't matter what tools you use to improve yourself, the main thing is a true desire to develop and understand which tools and ways to improve are the most suitable for you.
